Ah, the noble British Bulldog. Quietly dignified. Squat. Pugnacious. Flatulent. A canine representation of the spirit of the Blitz, Agincourt, 1966 and ‘all that’.
But if a survey is to be believed, it’s about time we replaced the bulldog as the unofficial national mascot with something a bit more in keeping with the spirit of the age. Like, er, a cavalier King Charles Spaniel, a favourite breed of none other than Margaret Thatcher, Princess Margaret and X-Factor harridan Sharon Osbourne.
Indeed, ‘the experts’ reckon that the doe-eyed spaniel’s true nature is more in keeping with modern Britain – it’s apologetic, polite, inquisitive (read: nosey) and indecisive. And 67% of 4,000 people surveyed by More Than agree.
That sound you can hear, by the way, is Winston Churchill turning in his grave.
“In terms of like-for-like traits, few British dog breeds match the modern national character better. It might be a small dog but that doesn’t mean it is a lesser symbol for the nation than the bulldog” mused John Ellenger, head of pet insurance at More Than. “As a versatile breed, healthy cavalier spaniels can be both laid-back and relaxed but also incredibly inquisitive, active and determined, following their noses everywhere they go as their canine instincts dictate. They can sometimes be loud, vocal animals when excited, but by and large they are agreeable dogs that behave in a very polite way when at home with their human companions.”
Consider the Money Shot's eyebrow raised to a full mast. In an increasingly fragmented society, we're not so sure that the nation's character can be summed up by a singular breed of dog. So, we turned to social media to see what dogs people thought best represented their own personas...
"Probably a Staffy... Misunderstood by many in society. Loyal, funny, a bit demented but also hard as hell when it comes to the crunch. Yeah, that's me."
"Alaskan Malamute, big and hairy, pretty much sums me up."
"Moondog, of course."
"I would be Milo from the Mask."
"I would be Digby, because he's the biggest dog in the world."
Short change – money news in brief
Pretty much everyone was talking about energy – if members of the big six weren’t raising their prices, then suits in Westminster were chucking the subject around like a highly charged political potato.
Tesco revealed that about half of its bread and salad gets chucked out.
‘Homeowner confidence’ has hit a four-year high, according to property website Zoopla.
On Covered mag this week
If you’re still stuck for a Halloween costume, then check this out. (WARNING: Contains ‘twerking’)
Emily Bater signed up to a bribery-based dating site so you don’t have to.
We sent Rebecca Lees on a Hunter S Thompson ‘gonzo’ mission to the NEC’s Caravan and Motorhome Show.
Phil Huff ran the rule over the Great Wall Steed and its mystery buttons.
Dan Bevis took a misty-eyed trip down memory lane, taking a look back at the Peugeot 208 and its ancestors.
The Consumer Credit Act ROCKS – here’s why.
With Movember looming on the horizon like a hirsute juggernaut, spare a thought for those of us without the ability to cultivate a 'flavour-saver' and the long, lonely month which awaits us.
However, bare top lips may well be a thing of the past. In Turkey, surgeries have begun to spring up which offer ‘follicular unit extraction’ on the face. You might have heard of this sort of thing before – it’s what soccerball’s Wayne Rooney had done to rid himself of a bald bonce a few years back.
So, while the Money Shot can but dream of a day when it can swagger into work like Ravishing Rick Rude, it had better start saving - the treatment starts at a whopping £5,000, which will probably stretch to a modest 'soul patch'. Donations to the usual address.