Ever fancied writing a sitcom? The Money Shot has. But it feels like everything's been done before.
We’ve already had hapless priests, bitter Norwich-based media personalities, socially awkward IT technicians, affluent singletons from New York, tragic office workers in Slough… the list goes on.
So, how’s this for a concept? A grizzled 1970s rocker and a hell-raising pop star-turned-UFO enthusiast move in next door to each other… with hilarious results! But it turns out this one is actually unfolding in real life as we speak.
Believe it or not, Led Zeppelin guitarist Jimmy Page and Rudebox hitmaker Robbie Williams live next-door to each other in a posh part of west London, and a neighbourly spat has erupted between the two chart-straddling behemoths over some proposed alterations to Robbie’s pad.
The gurning ex-Take That funster intends to install a lift and recording studio in his 46-bedroom mansion. But Jimmy has other ideas, and has written a terse letter to his local council to put a stop to it.
"I have been responsible for the protection of the Tower House [the incredible grade I listed building Page owns] for over 40 years and I am always concerned when proposals are made for nearby properties which may be detrimental to the well-being of this important heritage asset,” harrumphed the Moby Dick axe-wielder, wearing an expression redolent of Victor Meldrew at his most peeved.
Kensington and Chelsea Council has yet to rule on the planned work, but whatever the outcome, expect some frosty exchanges when Jimmy and the Robster both pop out to collect their milk and daily papers in the morning.
News in brief
The Office for National Statistics reveals that house prices came to a halt at the end of last year, with the average UK house price of £271,000 unchanged since November 2014.
Speaking of homes, the average cost of renting a gaff went up by 3% last year according to a survey by LSL Property Services.
The Institute of Customer Service has reported that the complaints of young people have pushed customer satisfaction to its lowest levels for years.
Millions of mobile phone users are overpaying by as much as £159 a year on their annual plan because they’re on the wrong contract, reckons Which?
On Covered mag this week
There’s a full-scale mortgage war on at the moment, which means you could potentially save a packet.
The Skoda Fabia has been named the What Car? car of the year.
Would you pay for your hotel wi-fi?
Join us next week for another thrilling instalment of the Money Shot. In the meantime, send us your letters