The Money Shot has been offered all sorts at the legendary after-hours session down its local, the Comparison Arms.
Greyhound puppies which looked a lot like ferrets. Suspicious blue ‘performance’ pills. Professional services from a man called Terry who will take care of those neighbours with irritating encroaching privet, “no questions asked”.
However, it’s yet to be offered car insurance. But according to the Association of British Insurers (ABI), there’s been a surge in dodgy folk selling bogus policies in pubs, clubs, car parks and university campuses.
Drivers who buy insurance from these charlatans (known as ‘ghost brokers’, supernatural fans) are essentially driving about uninsured, which is – as we all know – massively illegal.
"The consequences include getting a criminal record and a massive financial headache if found to be at fault for a crash. The risks are just not worth it – especially when you can shop around for the right policy at the lowest price," warned Mark Allen, the ABI’s fraud and financial crime manager, gravely.
If you’re dead set on picking up a trouser-bursting deal on your car insurance over a pint of mild and a pickled egg, turn a blind eye to the smiling man in the corner of the snug clutching a briefcase and direct your so-called ‘smart phone’ to Gocompare.com. It’s optimised to work brilliantly on mobile devices, and you can expect all the easy-to-use functionality and eye-popping bargains you get on a desktop. Mine’s a lager top!
News in brief
Speaking of car insurance, a Miss England semi-finalist and former pro footballer has been jailed for being involved in a whiplash scam, after being rumbled when videos of her skydiving while apparently injured emerged.
Diesel prices have hit a five-year low.
The Citizens Advice Bureau has warned holidaymakers to turn their roaming off or buy a travel data bundle to avoid paying jumbo-sized bills.
Homeowners are all in a lather about a potential rate rise. Remortgages leapt by 30% in June, as people looked to tie themselves into low-rate fixed deals while they’re still about, according to the Council of Mortgage Lenders. Read our resident mortgage expert waxing poetic about this very topic (and his prize-winning marrow) here.
A former council house in London has sold for £1.2m. It was bought for a mere £130,00 by its owners in 1990 under the Right to Buy act, representing an 800% profit. Cripes!
On Covered mag this week
Woof! Victoria Cao’s dog is taking over her life – here’s how.
Emily Bater went to CarFest and met a host of classic car owners.
Money Shot Letters
After reading last week’s Money Shot missive I was in a fit of rapturous delight this Wednesday, after witnessing a certain Great British Bake Off contestant crash out.
Perhaps this will teach the gamblers of the world a lesson: that to place money on such frivolous endeavours as whether someone can bake crisp biscotti is a fool’s errand and one not to be indulged by sane, God-fearing folk.
Yours in solemn faith,
Mrs Temperance Evans, Bethesda
Join us for another bodice-ripping instalment of the Money Shot next week. Until then, send us your letters.