Dr Moore-Money’s comparison clinic

Image of avuncular doctor enjoying espresso
Dr Moore-Money is ready to see you
"I feel that he’s started comparing things compulsively, and it’s getting out of control"
  • | by Kristian Dando

We’d like you to meet our new financial agony uncle, Dr Moore-Money.

He’s a seasoned comparison expert, and if there’s anything he doesn’t know about comparing stuff online, it’s not worth teaching.

Our readers have been emailing in with their financial comparison woes in their droves, and we've picked three for him to answer.

So, without further ado, let’s get down to it…

Dear Dr Moore-Money,

My husband and I used to enjoy a full and active comparison life.

Image of frustrated woman

When we got married, 10 years ago, we were at it all the time, spending long passionate afternoons and evenings in comparing anything we could. Car insurance, home insurance, you name it.

Nothing was off limits. He couldn’t seem to get enough of it, and neither could I!

Image of man idling on sofa

But lately, passions have cooled.

Despite my best efforts, I just can’t seem to get my husband up for it quite like I used to – I’ve tried everything, but even dangling a renewal notice tantalisingly in front of him while he watches the Formula One seems to elicit nothing more than a disinterested grunt.

What more can I do to put the spice back into our comparison life?

Unfulfilled, West Harlow

Dr Moore-Money says…

It’s only natural that after 10 years of marriage it can seem like you’ve done it all.

And what with the pressures of daily life – work, kids, and so forth – spending some quality time together comparing things can sometimes be the last thing on your minds!

Why not pencil in a Saturday afternoon and evening for some quality ‘together’ time?

Clear your diaries, switch off your phones, lock the door and pack the kids off to the grandparents. Slip into your best clothes, dim the lights, and maybe even pop the cork of a bottle of bubbly. Be careful though – too much alcohol may impair your husband’s ability to maintain his comparisons.

Stick some Kenny G on the stereo and fire up Gocompare.com – put your hand on your partner's, and guide him to the places you’ve always dreamed of going. You could even take turns blindfolding each other and taking control of the mouse.

Alternatively, you could surprise him when he comes home from work with a saucy treat – perhaps hide in a cupboard and jump out in your smalls, armed with a laptop computer logged in to your favourite comparison site.

Why not try something really new? You could take a look at Gocompare.com’s sizzling mortgage comparison service and see if you could save on your outgoings.

Dear Dr Moore-Money,

I’ve been having my suspicions about my new boyfriend for some time now.

Image of man and woman being frustrated

I feel that he’s started comparing things compulsively, and it’s getting out of control.

Rather than spending time with me, I’ll often catch him heading up towards the potting shed, furtively clutching a couple of well-thumbed copies of Which?

When I confronted him about it, he looked sheepish and said that he’s considering buying a new washing machine – even though I know he only had one installed last year.

What’s more, when it comes down to actually switching, he seems to have very little appetite for it, and panics and dithers at the vital moment– what can I possibly do to make him go the whole hog?

Frustrated, Hemel Hempstead

Dr Moore-Money says…

It sounds like your partner may be feeling some anxieties around switching – imagining the thrill of comparing items and fantasising about new washing machines or hoovers in magazines is a lot easier than the business of actually doing it.

But never fear! There’s plenty you can do to help him overcome his fears around comparison.

Be patient with your partner – perhaps slip into something comfortable and let him watch you as you slowly and sensuously switch your home insurance.

Then, when he’s raring to go, invite him to join you to compare a loan together – it could be perfect for that new washing machine he’s been promising himself.

Dear Dr Moore-Money,

I’m beginning to feel that I don’t satisfy my girlfriend.

She often talks wistfully of past lovers she’s had who’ve had balance transfer cards which went on and on – whereas mine has a paltry nine-month term.

I’m plagued by feelings of inadequacy – is there anything I can do to better impress her?

Anxious, St Leonards

Dr Moore-Money says…

Many men experience feelings of inadequacy around ex-partners' bulging balance transfers, but there’s a lot you can do to address the situation if you think your own length isn’t up to scratch.

There are a host of cards on the market at the moment with positively eye-popping durations.

So all you have to do is log on to Gocompare.com and compare credit cards to find a deal which will have her gasping with excitement.

Remember – bigger isn’t always better when it comes to balance transfer cards. It’s not always the lengths of the terms that are what’s important, but what you do with them.

Make a payment plan to ensure that your debt is paid off during the 0% terms, and whip out your calculator to make sure that the balance transfer fees don’t cancel out the potential savings.

You’ll soon have her purring with delight!

Send us your comparison problems and we’ll forward them on to the doc to get them sorted. In the meantime, check out Gocompare.com's extensive network of informative guides to help you safely through your comparison-related woes